I’m
sure that you’ve all heard the jokes that end something like this "If sex
is a pain in the ass then you’re doing it wrong". Believe it or not it
does have some bearing on this tutorial. Anal intercourse should not be painful.
Lack
of preparation is probably the single biggest turn-off about anal intercourse. A
typical scenario goes something like so. The couple decide to attempt anal
intercourse but are not really fully prepared for it, he tries to push into her
anus without much warning, she screams in shock and agony and ends up throwing
herself away from the offending member and hits her head on the headboard.
That’s the end of anal sex in their relationship.
With
the proper preparations anal intercourse can not only be as safe as any other
kind of sex, but at least as enjoyable if not more so than just regular
intercourse. The anus can be a very erogenous zone and it contains more nerve
endings than any other part of the body except for the clitoris. That said, I
will also throw in my usual, this doesn’t necessarily work for everyone
comment. Some will find it enjoyable and others won’t.
There
are a lot of people who get hung up on the "you’re not sticking that
thing in there" mentality. We have been so thoroughly conditioned to
believe that touching our anus is bad never mind actually playing with it on
purpose. I must confess that five years ago you would not have been able to
convince me that I would ever have anal intercourse much less like it. And I do
have to admit now that I do thoroughly enjoy it and it is a regular part of my
sex life.
There
is no necessary medical reason for the perceived taboo against anal intercourse.
If we are honest with ourselves the idea of doing something we’re not supposed
to is exciting. If you practice good hygiene there isn’t anything repulsive at
all about it. It is a good idea to make sure that you’ve gone to the washroom
prior to commencing your anal play. If you desire you can use an enema if you so
desire, but it isn’t necessary. If you’re really worried, hop in the shower
together and lather each other up and then you can be assured that everything is
as clean as possible.
If
you haven’t been with your partner for a very long time, then you should
certainly be using a condom for anal intercourse. Many couples will use a condom
for anal intercourse anyway. It’s not a good idea to go from anal sex to
vaginal sex without first cleaning yourself very thoroughly. The bacteria that
live in your rectum can really create havoc if they take up residence in the
vaginal canal.
Now
that you are a little more comfortable with the fact that it’s ok to be
interested in anal sex you can start exploring your ass. If you’ve never had
any experience with anyone playing with your ass you need to explore a bit on
your own and see how it feels and get comfortable with the idea. In order to
enjoy anal intercourse you have to be able to exercise control over your mind.
If you are tense then your asshole is going to be closed tighter than a drum and
nothing will be able to penetrate it. It is incredible just how big a part your
mind plays in anal intercourse. I have experienced anal intercourse on numerous
occasions and have enjoyed it thoroughly, however I have found that the times
I’ve enjoyed it the most have been those times where I’ve been the one to
initiate it. It seems to be so easy then, where on other occasions it is a bit
more of struggle to get into the right frame of mind and relax.
The best place to start your explorations would be in the bathtub. Draw
yourself a nice warm bath and climb in. Alternatives would be the shower or even
just lying down on your bed. Take your fingers and begin running them over the
insides of your thighs and over your pussy. As you become comfortable, draw your
legs up and run your fingers down the crack that run from your pussy to your
anus. See how it feels when you lightly touch your anus with your finger. Try
pushing several of your fingers down against your anus. If it feels pleasurable,
you might want to try masturbating while your fingers are pushing down on your
anus.
If you find that this produces pleasurable feelings for you or you think
that it might keep up the exploration. Take it nice and slow, there isn’t any
big hurry. The rectum is similar to an elastic pipe with a set of muscular rings
at the end, the anus. The anus acts as a plug, to stop things from going out or
letting them in. It tightens and loosens like purse strings on a bag and is
fairly strong. The rectum can easily accommodate a large penis. Think about it,
if the rectum can handle all your excrement then the smaller things like penises
and fingers are really not a problem. The rectum is a sturdy flexible organ and
isn’t going to be hurt by fingers or a penis or other similar objects unless
there is intent to hurt. Before inserting a finger into your anus make sure that
your fingernails are cut short and don’t have any sharp edges as they could
easily scratch or tear the tissue inside the rectum and that won’t be a fun
feeling at all.
After
some preliminary touching you will find that you want to move on and actually
insert a finger into your anus. At this point it is a good idea to have some
good lubricant on hand. I personally would recommend a lubricant that is water
soluble. I have been advised by some of my readers that vaseline is also an
acceptable lubricant as the rectum is a self-cleaning organism, unlike the
vagina.
Make yourself comfortable on your bed or whatever spot you’ve chosen
for your exploration and bend your legs slightly bringing your feet closer to
your ass. Using one hand get into a comfortable rhythm of masturbation and take
a finger of the other hand, usually the index or the middle finger works best,
and apply the lubricant of your choice to it. Gently start to push the tip of
your finger into your anus. You will feel it give way and your finger will go in
a little ways. To insert the finger further you need to keep pushing gently and
try to relax your anus. This will enable you to get past the thick muscle and
into the rectum. This may feel a bit uncomfortable at first, and there may be a
little bit of a burning sensation or irritation. This is a normal response, just
try to relax your ass completely and continue the masturbation with your other
hand. If you want to, bring yourself to climax with your finger still in your
rectum and see how it feels. If this feels good to you, then by all means
continue with your exploration. If it doesn’t feel good then withdraw the
finger and try again another time. Take all the time you need to become
comfortable with yourself.
If you have enjoyed yourself so far, then you might want to try wiggling
your finger around inside your rectum and see what it feels like. The inside of
the rectum is very soft and comfy. I find it’s a rather interesting sensation.
Try moving your finger around in different directions and see what different
movements feel like. If you have your fingers from your other hand inside your
pussy you can push them towards each other and feel them pushing on walls that
separate them. Eventually you will want to stretch the rectum a bit more so that
you can prepare for your partner’s cock at a later point.
One
way to do this is to try sliding another finger into your rectum to join the
first one and to try spreading the fingers as far apart as you can. Only do what
feels comfortable for you. Don’t feel that you have to accomplish everything
in the same day. You may do better if you explore a bit at a time over several
days. Practice tensing and relaxing your anus around your fingers.
Now
that you are comfortable with fingers, it’s time to move on to something a bit
more realistic. A good dildo is excellent to practice with. You can obtain one
at a love shop or order from many places on the internet. I would recommend one
made of plastic rather than latex. Latex dildos are difficult to clean and have
soft pores that bacteria could be harbored in. Don’t use anything with sharp
edges or that can easily break.
On
your own try inserting the dildo into your ass gradually, making sure that it is
well lubricated. Try pushing it in and out of your anus while you masturbate
yourself with the other hand. I have found that if I’m already excited from
masturbating it is much simpler to push the dildo further into my anus.
From this point you can move on and involve your partner in the
exploration process. Make sure that he is aware that you are setting the pace
and not to rush the whole process. He will be greatly rewarded by the results of
patience when he finally gets to experience your ass, especially if this will be
a first for you.
There
are a couple of ways to get your partner involved in the exploration of your
ass. They are postillioning and analingus.
Postillioning
is the insertion of fingers into the anus and may involve massaging it and the
rectum. At it’s most extreme you can end up with anal fisting, but that’s a
whole topic on it’s own.
The
insertion of your partner’s fingers into your anus is a great lead up to the
ultimate of anal sex or it can even be a pleasant enhancement to regular
intercourse. This allows your partner to become familiar with how you may react
during anal sex. It gives him a chance to explore your body with you.
Normally,
I find that the index or middle fingers work the best, being a little longer
than the others and stronger as well. Don’t forget the lube! Run your fingers
over the anal opening, kneading and pressing against it. You can use a circular
motion if you like. It’s just like giving a massage, you are helping the area
around the anus to relax. Make the insertion by pressing gently and firmly
inwards, wiggling the tip of your finger as necessary. At this point if your
partner is comfortable and relaxed the finger should slide in fairly easily. On
the other hand, if the ass is tense then your finger will not make any headway
at all. You and your partner will have to decide at this point whether or not to
continue or to perhaps leave it and come back to it another time.
Once your finger is past the anal opening you will feel the thick,
strong, muscular ring which is the anus and beyond it, the soft sides of the
rectum. You will need to keep at least your fingertip beyond the anus or the
contraction of the muscle could just force the finger right out. When your
finger is inside explore a bit, pushing the finger as far in as it will go,
flicking back and forth.
A
great way to enhance this exploration would be to suck on your partner’s clit
or stick your other fingers in her pussy. I have found that this combination
makes for some pretty powerful orgasms. There is nothing better than having his
mouth wrapped around my clit and fingers wiggling in my ass. It’s a great
feeling.
Now
for the other way to explore the rear end. This method is typically called
rimming or can also be known as "analingus". It involves kissing,
licking and sucking the anus. A lot of people have a problem with this concept
since we’ve been taught for so long that we’re not supposed to play with our
asses, that they are dirty and bad. There is the possibility of getting VD or
hepatitis from an infected person but the primary fears of rimming are mainly to
do with smell, taste and personal preference. If these things are a concern to
you, then perhaps the ideal time for this sort of exploration would be right
after getting out of the shower. You can also buy dams, which are made from
latex, very similar to the dams they use in the dental offices, only a lot
thinner. You would apply this to the area, so that you would not be coming in
direct contact with the person’s ass but they would still get all the great
sensations.
Analingus
works so well because the anus opening is so incredibly sensitive and the lips
and tongue are warm and expressive. It’s easy to do and can be done in any
positions where the buttocks can be spread far enough apart to admit the tongue.
Run your tongue over the anus, licking it in soft wet strokes or circle it,
running your tongue around the edge of it slowly and delicately. You can flick
the tip of your tongue rapidly over the opening or try inserting your tongue as
far as it will go pushing and stroking it back and forth. Try brushing your lips
over the spot or sucking hard on the anus. If you are being rimmed try to push
down the anus and relax the anus as if you were shitting, it will expand a
little outward giving your partner more area to caress or nibble at. Use your
imagination and experiment. Just remember to pay attention to your partner’s
reactions to your different techniques.
Now
we can get into the really fun stuff... positions, positions, positions. Your
positions should only be limited by your physical ability to get in and out of
them and by what feels comfortable. Some positions will work wonderfully for
some and not for others. It’s up to you to determine which ones work best. I
will give you a few suggestions to start with.
The
first one and probably the most important one in my mind is with the woman on
top facing toward the man. I say this because if it’s your first time
experiencing anal sex, this position will allow you to have control of the
insertion of his penis into your ass. This was what I used for my first anal
experience and I felt comfortable because I had the control over how far his
penis was going or not going to penetrate me. I could stop when I felt I needed
time to adjust to the sensation and then continue when I felt ready to. This is
still my all time favorite position.
Ladies, all you need to do is to straddle your partner facing toward him.
Make sure that you've got lots of lubricant applied to his penis and to your
ass. You want to be able to have his penis slide in smoothly. Grasp his penis
firmly and position the head at the opening of your anus. Hold it in place while
you gently push your ass down against it. It will move fairly smoothly for the
first little bit and then you are going to encounter some resistance, this is
where the muscular ring is. To get past this point, you really need to relax and
push down gently until you feel it pop past the muscle. Now, you might want to
take a minute here to absorb how it feels so far. You may feel like you’re
going to shit yourself. This is a normal feeling and you don’t actually shit
yourself.
One
of my readers had suggested that breathing plays a very big role in successful
anal intercourse. It has been their experience that a woman will have a much
easier time of it if she controls her breathing. If the woman takes a deep
breath and exhales slowly during the initial penetration it makes the act more
pleasurable for both partners.
Once you’ve adjusted, try pressing down further on his penis, taking
more inside your ass. This is a good time for your partner to play with your
breasts, stroke and play with your pussy or whatever else works for turning you
on. The more sexually excited you are the less attention you are going to pay to
any discomfort you might feel. Then you can start moving up and down on his
penis, letting it slide in and out of your ass. You are in complete control and
can wiggle side to side, move up and down as slow or as fast as you’d like.
You can also control the depth and force of penetration.
When
you’re comfortable with this, you may allow your partner to become more of a
participant instead of having him remain passive. It’s all up to you and
ladies I don’t think that he’s going to argue too much, especially if this
is something that he’s been wanting to do and is finally getting the
opportunity.
Here are some other positions that you can try out to see what you like best.
Doggie Style:
This position that works so well for regular vaginal intercourse is also a good
choice for anal intercourse as well. Kneel on your knees and elbows, remembering
to relax your ass. Your partner kneels directly behind your ass, facing towards
you. He will then bend forward guiding his penis to your anus opening and gently
pushes it inside. Entry is made easier if you try to draw his penis into your
ass as he is pushing. Your partner can then move his penis around inside your
ass by thrusting his hips forward and back, while you either remain still or can
move your hips from side to side. This position allows for fairly easy and deep
penetration.
Full Front:
In this position the woman lies on her back and pulls her knees up as close to
her chest as she can manage and then rests her feet on her partner’s
shoulders. The man pushes down on her face to face. If required a pillow can be
inserted under the woman’s pelvis to raise it higher up. The man can also push
the woman’s feet up over her head. This position allows for easy and deep
penetration.
Standing:
In this position both partners are standing facing the same
direction. The woman can then bend over at the waist (it is a good idea to use a
wall or chair or something for support). This can also be accomplished from a
kneeling position at the edge of the bed. Depending on the height difference
some adjustments may need to be made. This position is a convenient one for
outdoor use and allows easy penetration and full movement provided there is
something solid to hang on to.
Flat on stomach:
In this position, have the woman lay flat on her stomach (use a pillow to raise
the hips if needed). This allows the woman to relax more fully and her hand are
free to move wherever they like. Since the man will lay on top of the woman he
can also be more relaxed and have freer hand movements. The penetration in this
position is not as easily accomplished and thrusting is difficult. The woman is
also fairly restricted in her movement.
Side by Side:
From the position above, the partners can fairly easily roll over onto their
sides, both facing the same way, drawing one leg up. This position allows for
greater relaxation of the bodies and hands are free to explore and caress. Entry
is easy and penetration is fairly deep for this position. Movement can be rather
limited, although vigorous thrusting is possible once you get used to the
posture of the position.
Side by Side – facing together:
This is another variation to the two previous positions. In this particular
position, the partners lie on their sides facing one another. The man must
extend his pelvis in between the woman’s bent legs. This position allows deep
entry and the hands are free for exploration. This position is also a little
more intimate and allows for kissing and eye contact to take happen. Movement is
fairly easy once insertion is made.
That's it for this tutorial. If you have any comments or
suggestions please feel free to send me an email. If you'd like to share your
first time experience with others let me know and we will start a section for
them. I hope that this tutorial has made sense to you and provided you with
some useful information.
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